xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx L i o n ( 2 0 1 2 ) T h e U n o f f i c i a l O n l i n e G u i t a r C h o r d s S T E P H E N L Y N C H xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx +--------------------------PLEASE NOTE--------------------------+ + This file is the work of Jordan Lapping and represents his + + transcription of the album. You may only use this file for + + private study, scholarship, or research. The contents may not + + be duplicated for use with other websites without written + + permission. Thank you for understanding. Enjoy. + +---------------------------------------------------------------+ ARTIST: Stephen Lynch ALBUM: Lion (2012) GERNE: Comedy SONGS: 1. Tattoo 2. No Meat 3. So This Is Outer Space? 4. Lorelei 5. Lion 6. Tennessee 7. Let Me Inside 8. The Night I Laid You Down 9. Too Jesusy 10. The Gathering 11. You'll Do 12. Whiskey Dick 13. Hey Love xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 1. T a t t o o xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tabbed by Jordan Lapping Tuning: E (Standard) Capo 2nd Fret [Capo 3rd Fret when played live] CHORDS [relative to capo]: Am C Cadd9 D G e]---0----0----0----2----3---| B]---1----1----1----3----0---| G]---0----0----0----2----0---| D]---2----2----0----0----0---| A]---0----3----2---------2---| E]-----------------------3---| INTRO: ||: G / / / | D / / / | C / / Cadd9 | Am / / / :|| (x2) VERSE 1: G D C Cadd9 Am You got a unicorn, butterfly, angel wings - inner thigh G D C Cadd9 Am Queer tattoo, that's a queer tattoo G D C Cadd9 Am Flaming skull smoking pot, that's the opposite of not a G D C Cadd9 Am Queer tattoo, it's a queer tattoo VERSE 2: G D C Cadd9 Am You got a Tweety Bird, you got a school mascot, you got a Hello Kitty; tell you what you got G D C Cadd9 Am Got a queer tattoo, such a queer tattoo G D C Cadd9 Am You think that symbol in Japanese means "strength" or "honor" - nigger, please G D C Cadd9 Am It means "queer tattoo", that's a queer tattoo INTERLUDE: ||: G / / / | D / / / | C / / Cadd9 | Am / / / :|| (x2) VERSE 3: G D C Cadd9 Am Any lower back tattoo is queer, it might as well say "Insert Cock Here" G D C Cadd9 Am Whore tattoo, that's a whore tattoo G D C Cadd9 Am And that teardrop under your eye, that you got in prison 'cause you killed a guy G D C Cadd9 Am That's a… cool tattoo; Sir, that's cool tattoo VERSE 4: G D C Cadd9 Am You got a comedy mask, got a tragedy mask, any fucking mask then you must've asked G D C Cadd9 Am For a queer tattoo, "Give me your most queer tattoo" G D C Cadd9 Am Your child's name with the words "Be strong" would be beautiful, but they spelt 'strong' wrong G D C Cadd9 Am Yeah, they spelled it 'stong' - your stupid kid will now be 'stong' G D C Cadd9 Am How the hell they get that wrong? Weren't you watching when they put that shit on? INTERLUDE: ||: G / / / | D / / / | C / / Cadd9 | Am / / / :|| (x2) VERSE 5: G D C Cadd9 Am You love your laughing Jesus tat, but that's just Jesus laughing at your G D C Cadd9 Am Queer tattoos, so many queer tattoos G D C Cadd9 Am I guess you got that tribal-band from a tribe indigenous to the land of G D C Cadd9 Am Queer tattoos, really queer tattoos VERSE 6: G D C Cadd9 Am You got barbed wire, you got a poker Ace, got that fucked up thing on Mike Tyson's face G D C Cadd9 Am Got a queer tattoo, a seriously queer tattoo G D C Cadd9 Am And by 'queer' I just mean 'bad', it wouldn't mean gay unless you had G D C Am A pink triangle on a rainbow flag, with a bear wearing leather and a red ball gag G D C Cadd9 Am That's a queer tattoo; a literally queer tattoo OUTRO: || G / / / | D / / / | C / / Cadd9 | Am / / / || xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 2. N o M e a t xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tabbed by Jordan Lapping Tuning: E (Standard), Capo 5th Fret CHORDS [relative to capo]: Am C Cmaj9 F G e]---0----0----0----x----3---| B]---1----1----1----1----3---| G]---2----0----0----2----0---| D]---2----2----0----3----0---| A]---0----3----2---(0)---2---| E]------------------x----3---| INTRO: Am G C e]--------------------------------------------------------------------------| B]-----------1-----------------0--------------------------------------------| G]-----2-----------0-----0-----------0-----0-----0-----0-----0-----0-----0--| D]--------2-----2-----------0-----0-----------0-----2-----3-----2-----0-----| A]--0-----------------------------------3-----------------------------------| E]--------------------3-----------------------------------------------------| Am G C e]--------------------------------------------------------------------------| B]-----------1-----------------0--------------------------------------------| G]-----2-----------0-----0-----------0-----0-----0-----0--------------------| D]--------2-----2-----------0-----0-----------0-----2-----3----------(2p0)--| A]--0-----------------------------------3-----------------------------------| E]--------------------3-----------------------------------------------------| Am G C C e]--------------------------------------------------0-----0-0-0-------0-0-0--0-0-0-0-0--| B]-----------1-----------------0--------------------1-----1-1-1-------1-1-1--1-1-1-1-1--| G]-----2-----------0-----0-----------0--------------0-----0-0-0-------0-0-0--0-0-0-0-0--| D]--------2-----2-----------0-----0-----------------0h2---2-2-2-------2-2-2--0h2-2-2-2--| A]--0-----------------------------------3-----------3-----3-3-3--3----3-3-3--3-3-3-3-3--| E]--------------------3-----------------------------------------------------------------| VERSE 1: C F Am G Vegan living, so healthy and clean C F Am G So much brown rice, so many mung beans G F C F C And no meat - not one bite of meat F C F C Juicy meat - succulent meat CHORUS 1: G F C Instead I get gluten and seaweed stew G F C Rice, milk, and lentils, and fucking tofu G F C I respect every creature, from horse, fly, to cow C G F C But I'd blow a goat for some bacon right now C G F C Cmaj9 Yeah, I'd blow a goat for some bacon right now TRANSITION 1: || Am / / / | G / / / | C / / / | F / / / | | Am / / / | G / / / | C / / / | C / / / | C / / / | C / / / || VERSE 2: C F Am G You eat your southern fried chicken and, well I'll just have fruit C F Am G How's that t-bone? No, really, it's cool - I'll just chew on this turnip root G F C With a couple chickpeas F C Kill me please CHORUS 2: G F C I'm tired of humus and bulgar wheat G F C Tofurky, tofuckyourself, I want some meat G F C I respect every creature, the birds and the bees C G F C But I'd eat the shit out some Whopper with cheese C G F C Cmaj9 Believe me, I'd fug up that Whopper with cheese TRANSITION 2: ||: Am / / / | G / / / | C / / / | F / / / :|| x7 || Am / / / | G / / / | C / / / | C / / / | C / / / | C / / / || CHORUS 3/OUTRO: G F C Alfalfa sprouts, and a red beet G F C A handful of Trail Mix, mm-mmm, what a treat G F C How about some soy yoghurt served in a bowl? C G F C I'd rather eat a hobo's asshole C G F C Yeah, I'd rather eat a hobo's asshole xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 3. S o T h i s I s O u t e r S p a c e ? xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tabbed by Jordan Lapping Tuning: E (Standard) CHORDS USED: A B C#m E F#m e]---0----x----4----0----2---| B]---2----4----5----0----2---| G]---2----4----6----1----2---| D]---2----4----6----2----4---| A]---0----2----4----2----4---| E]------------------0----2---| INTRO: ||: C#m / / / | A / / / | E / / / | B / / / :|| (x2) VERSE 1: E A F#m So this is outer space? What a lovely place B (E) I can't wait to tell the human race E A F#m Hello alien, will you be my friend? B (E) Wait, there's something I can't comprehend PRE-CHORUS 1: E A F#m It's not outer space at all, I'm just at the mall B Holy shit, I'm freaking out ya'll CHORUS 1: C#m A E B C#m You're on a-cid, you're on a-cid C#m A E You're on a-cid B (C#m) Oh, that's right, let's go to the arcade TRANSITION 1: ||: C#m / / / | A / / / | E / / / | B / / / :|| (x2) VERSE 2: E A F#m LSD will keep my sane, help me reach a higher plane B (E) According to the spiders in my brain E A F#m Hey there's a girl I know, I should say hello B (E) But her face is melting, gotta go PRE-CHORUS 2: E A F#m Whoa, I'm freaking out again, where's that alien? B I need him to tell me that this trip will end CHORUS 2: C#m A E B C#m You're on a-cid, you're on a-cid C#m A E You're on a-cid B All the colors, pretty colors BRIDGE: A E B C#m I met the devil, he was at the Cinnabon A E B With a monkey named Romone A E B C#m Whoa, there was dancing on a seven-headed snake A E B Man, this acid's way too strong A B (C#m) Acid's way too strong TRANSITION 2: ||: C#m / / / | A / / / | E / / / | B / / / :|| (x2) VERSE 3: E A F#m In a psychedelic state, watch my pupils dilate B (E) Staring in this mirror for three hours straight E A F#m My reflection starts to glow, then says "Man, it's time to go" B (E) Hey, reflection, please don't harsh my mellow bro VERSE 4: E A F#m Whoa, there's that alien! Sir, we meed again B (E) I've got a tab of window pane for you my friend E A F#m Take too much, you'll peak too soon, what a crazy afternoon B Me and an alien are tripping balls to the moon CHORUS 3/OUTRO: C#m A E B C#m We're on a-cid, we're on a-cid C#m A E We're on a-cid B E I got some left for the devil and Romone xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 4. L o r e l e i xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tabbed by Jordan Lapping Tuning: E (Standard) CHORDS USED: A A6 A6* A7 A7* Bbdim Bm C D D* D7 G e]--x----0----2----3----0----0----2----0----2----5----8----3--| B]--2----2----2----2----2----2----3----1----3----7----7----0--| G]--2----2----2----2----0----0----4----0----2----7----7----0--| D]--2----4----2----2----2----2----4----2----0----7----7----0--| A]--0----0----0----0----0----1----2----3---------5----5----2--| E]---------------------------------------------------------3--| INTRO: || D / G | D / A | D / G | D / A || VERSE 1: D D* D7 G C G D Lorelei, Lorelei had a la- -zy eye A A6 A Bbdim Bm A G Straight ahead she would stare and still see shit over there D A (D) With her la-zy eye TRANSITION 1: || D / G | D / A | D / G | D / A || VERSE 2: D D* D7 G C G D G D Annabel, Annabel had an odd, odd odd smell A A6 A Bbdim Bm A G Cigarettes and gin, with some ball-sweat mixed in D A (D) Such an odd, odd smell TRANSITION 2: || D / G | D / A | D / G | D / A || || A / A6 | A7 A6* A | Bm / A | G / / || || D / / | A7* / / ||: D / G | D / A :|| VERSE 3: D D* D7 G C G D Donna Ruth, Donna Ruth had a sna-ggletooth A A6 A Bbdim Bm A G Smile would win her no fans, but she could open some cans D A (D) With her snaggletooth TRANSITION 3: || D / G | D / A | D / G | D / / || VERSE 4: D D* D7 G C G D Mary Claire, Mary Claire had long, long red hair A A6 A Bbdim Bm A G Soft and silky, I swear, but her asshole is where D A (D) She had long red hair TRANSITION 4: || D / G | D / A | D / G | D / / || BRIDGE: A G D Whoa, these ladies were lovely, so I don't know why A A6 A G D I sent them all packing, yeah I let them all fly A G D I should be cool, give them a-nother try A A6 A G A Except for the one with the lazy eye - can't get passed that one VERSE 5/OUTRO: D D* D7 G C G D Rosario, Rosario was from Me-xico A A6 A Bbdim Bm A G There's nothing wrong with that, but her ankles were fat D A D So she had to go A A6 A Bbdim Bm A G Nothing wrong with that, but her ankles were fat D A D So she had to go xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 5. L i o n xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tabbed by Jordan Lapping Tuning: E (Standard) CHORDS USED: C Em G e]---0-----0-----3---| B]---1-----0-----0---| G]---0-----0-----0---| D]---2-----2-----0---| A]---3-----2-----2---| E]---------0-----3---| INTRO [NARRATION]: "Howdy, folks. This next song is a story of a gal who just couldn't choose between to fellers. One was about the nicest guy you ever met, and the other one, well, he's kind of a dick. Let's listen in as these boys settle it the only way they know how; through singing. And a 1, and a 2... " CHORUS 1: G C Em G C Em ALL: Make a choice - will it be G C Em #1: A guy who really, really loves you baby, baby G C Em #2: Or a guy like me? VERSE 1: G C Em #1: I would comfort you when you're sad G C Em #2: Well, I would just leave you crying G C Em #1: I would protect you if a lion attacked you G C Em #2: Not trying to fuck with no lion VERSE 2: G C Em #1: I would fight a man for your honor G C Em #2: I don't know no kung fu G C Em #1: I'd carry you across a muddy field G #2: Bitch, these Jordans are new(!) CHORUS 2: G C Em G C Em ALL: Make a choice - will it be G C Em #1: A guy who really, really loves you baby, baby G C Em #2: Or a guy like me? VERSE 3: G C Em #1: I would read you romantic poetry G C Em #2: I'll leave that shit on the shelf G C Em #1: My love making would be sweet and tender G C Em #2: This thing ain't sucking itself, no VERSE 4: G C Em #1: I would take you to the finest restaurants G C Em #2: Here's an old Baby Ruth G C Em #1: I would tell you how pretty you look tonight G #2: And I would tell you the truth CHORUS 3: G C Em G C Em ALL: Make a choice - will it be G C Em #1: A guy who really, really loves you baby, baby G C Em #2: Or a guy like me? BRIDGE 1: G C Em ALL: But ba-by, baby G C Em #1: The choice is up to you G C Em ALL: So pick me quickly G C Em #2: 'Cause I've got shit to do G C Em ALL: It's true dear, I do dear G C Em #1: I want you to be mine G C Em ALL: But let's be clear here G #2: I'm still not fighting no lion... TRANSITION 1: ||: G / C / | Em / / / | G / C / | Em / / / :|| (x4) [NARRATION]: "Let's see what happens next... " VERSE 5: G C Em #1: Every day I'd say how much I love you G C Em #2: ... I would not G C Em #1: I'd surprise you with gifts and flowers G C Em #2: I'd spend your money on pot, yeah VERSE 4: G C Em #1: We would stay up all night just talking G C Em #2: I'd fall asleep when I came G C Em #1: I'd spell your name out with a thousand rose petals G #2: I don't remember your name! CHORUS 4: G C Em G C Em ALL: Make a choice - will it be G C Em #1: A guy who really, really loves you baby, baby G C Em #2: Or a guy like me? CHORUS 5: G C Em G C Em ALL: Make a choice - will it be G C Em #1: A guy who really, really loves you baby, baby G #2: Or a guy like me? OUTRO [NARRATION]: "See? I told you he was kind of a dick. " xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 6. T e n n e s s e e xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tabbed by Jordan Lapping Tuning: E (Standard), Capo 4th Fret CHORDS USED [relative to Capo]: Am C Cmaj9 F G e]---0----0----0----x----3---| B]---1----1----1----1----0---| G]---2----0----0----2----0---| D]---2----2----0----3----0---| A]---0----3----2---(0)---2---| E]-----------------------3---| INTRO: ||: C / / F | C / / F :|| (x2) VERSE 1: C F C I've seen rocky mountains and great lakes C G Stood beneath the redwood tree F C Cmaj9 Am F But wherever I go my heart aches C G C Cmaj9 For a place called Tennessee CHORUS 1: Am F C G Oh, come with me F C F G Where the whiskey flows like wine and the meth labs are divine Am F C G Oh, I wanna be F C F G Where the sweet tobacco grows and it's picked by poor Negros N/C (C) In Tennessee TRANSITION 1: || C / / F | C / / F || VERSE 2: C F C Well, it's a place where dueling banjos play C G And the mountain folk run free F C Cmaj9 Am F Where the children can spell 'K.K.K.' C G C Cmaj9 But can not spell Tennessee CHORUS 2: Am F C G Oh, come with me F C F G Where every cheek filled with chew, and no-one's ever seen a Jew Am F C G Oh, I wanna be F C F G Where the hotdogs are deep fried - that's the reason Elvis died N/C (C) In Tennessee TRANSITION 2: || C / / F | C / / F || INSTRUMENTAL INTERLUDE [verse chords]: || C / / / | F / C / | C / / / | G / / / | | F / C Cmaj9 | Am / F / | C / G / | C / / Cmaj9 | CHORUS 3: Am F C G Oh, come with me F C F G Where the baptist preachers shout that if you're gay, you best get out Am F C G Oh, I wanna be F C F G Where hospitality's the thing, just ask Martin Luther King N/C (C) Shot in Tennessee TRANSITION 3: ||: C / / F | C / / F :|| (x2) VERSE 3: C F C The birthplace of Aretha, Queen of Soul C G The B.B. King, and Al Gore F C Cmaj9 Am F Well, I'm not saying it's a shit hole C G C Cmaj9 But they don't live there anymore CHORUS 4: Am F C G Oh, I wanna see F C F G Mountain Dew in every cup, and all the dentists just gave up Am F C G Oh, come with me F C F G In my flat-bed pick-up truck; that's where the classy ladies fuck N/C F In Tennessee F C Oh, in Tennessee xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 7. L e t M e I n s i d e xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tabbed by Jordan Lapping Tuning: E (Standard), Capo 4th Fret CHORDS USED [relative to Capo]: Am7 C Cmaj7/B Cmaj9 e]---0------0------0------0---| B]---1------1------1------1---| G]---0------0------0------0---| D]---2------2------2------0---| A]---0------3------2------2---| E]----------------------------| INTRO: C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B e]-----------------------------------------------------------------| B]--------1---------------1---------------1---------------1--------| G]--------------0---------------0---------------0---------------0--| D]-----2-----2---------2-----2---------2-----2---------2-----2-----| (x4) A]--3---------------2---------------0---------------2--------------| E]-----------------------------------------------------------------| VERSE 1: C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) Will you show me your heart, will you open it wide? C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) Expose the raw nerves, will you let me inside? C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) Can you tear down the wall, for the motor has dried C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) Will you show me your heart, will you let me inside? TRANSITION 1: C Cmaj9 Am7 Cmaj9 e]--------0---------------0---------------0---------------0--------| B]--------------1---------------1---------------1---------------1--| G]-----0-----0---------0-----0---------0-----0---------0-----0-----| D]-----------------------------------------------------------------| (x2) A]--3---------------2---------------0---------------2--------------| E]-----------------------------------------------------------------| VERSE 2: C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) There's not to infer, and nothing implied C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) I literally mean, will you let me inside? C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) I'm at your front door, it's not open - I tried C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) It's cold as balls out here, let me inside TRANSITION 2: ||: C / / | Cmaj9 / / | Am7 / / | Cmaj9 / / :|| (x2) VERSE 3: C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) You know when it's dark I get terrified C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) Come on, seriously, will you let me inside? C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) Think I just saw a possum, all beady-eyed C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) Those things fucking scare me, please let me inside TRANSITION 2: ||: C / / | Cmaj9 / / | Am7 / / | Cmaj9 / / :|| (x2) "Let me inside" VERSE 4: C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) Are you angry with me, are you preoccupied? C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) Are you taking a shit and can't let me inside? C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) I can smell from the kitchen, the food that you fried C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) I've had half of a PowerBar, let me inside TRANSITION 3: ||: C / / | Cmaj9 / / | Am7 / / | Cmaj9 / / :|| (x2) "Let me inside" VERSE 5: C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) How can this situation be rectified? C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) Hey, here's an idea - fucking let me inside C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) Tried to climb through your window, but I was too wide C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) You should get bigger windows or let me inside TRANSITION 4: ||: C / / | Cmaj9 / / | Am7 / / | Cmaj9 / / :|| (x2) "Let me inside" VERSE 5: C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) Are you with a new guy that you're trying to hide? C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) Girl, I'm down for a threesome, just let me inside C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) Okay, that's the last straw, I'm a man, I've got pride C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) And my toesies are freezing, please let me inside TRANSITION 4: ||: C / / | Cmaj9 / / | Am7 / / | Cmaj9 / / :|| (x2) "Let me inside" VERSE 6/OUTRO: C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B e]-----------------------------------------------------------------| B]--------1---------------1---------------1---------------1--------| G]--------------0---------------0---------------0---------------0--| D]-----2-----2---------2-----2---------2-----2---------2-----2-----| (x2) A]--3---------------2---------------0---------------2--------------| E]-----------------------------------------------------------------| C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B e]-----------------------------------------------------------------| B]-----------------------------------------------------------------| G]-----------------------------------------------------------------| D]-----------------------------------------------------------------| (x2) A]--3---------------2---------------0---------------2--------------| E]-----------------------------------------------------------------| C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) Will you show me your heart, will you open it wide? C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) Expose the raw nerves, will you let me inside? C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B (C) Can you tear down the wall, for the motor has dried C Cmaj7/B Am7 Cmaj7/B 'Til then I'll be sitting here, waiting out... xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 8. T h e N i g h t I L a i d Y o u D o w n xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tabbed by Jordan Lapping Tuning: E (Standard) CHORDS USED: C D Em G Gmaj7/F# e]---0----2----0----3----3---| B]---1----3----0----0----0---| G]---0----2----0----0----0---| D]---2----0----2----0----0---| A]---3---------2----2----x---| E]-------------0----3----2---| INTRO: ||: G / / C | G / / / | D / / C | G / / / :|| (x2) VERSE 1 [Stephen]: G C G We were young, maybe twenty D C G You wore a white dressing gown G C G Drinking wine and dancing slowly D C G Gmaj7/F# On the night I laid you down CHORUS 1 [Stephen]: Em C G Gmaj7/F# And the moonlight revealed your body Em C D As the radio played some old Phil Collins songs G C G And we believed in something holy D C G On the night I laid you down TRANSITION 1: || G / / C | G / / / | D / / C | G / / / || VERSE 2 [Courtney]: G C G We had love in our eyes D C G We passion in our souls G C G There was fire in our kisses D C G Gmaj7/F# But it was not a Phil Collins song CHORUS 2 Courtney + (Stephen) + [both]: Em C G It might have been like Mike + The Mechanics (I don't know who that is) Gmaj7/F# Em C D Yes, you do, he was the other guy in Genesis G C G (Mmmm, I'm pretty sure that it was Phil Collins) No, it wasn't D C G [On this night I laid you down] TRANSITION 2: || G / / C | G / / / | D / / C | G / / / || VERSE 3 (Stephen) + Courtney + [both]: G C G (Any way) (it doesn't matter) Any way Doesn't matter D C G (We made love) ['Til the dawn] We made love G C G (Two hearts beating) (is all we heard) Two hearts beating Oh boy, here we go D C G Gmaj7/F# (Besides that old) [Phil Collins song] There was fuckin' no CHORUS 3 (Stephen) + Courtney + [both]: Em C G (Well, it might have been that song from the movie with the jambox) Say anything Gmaj7/F# Em C D (That's the one) Who the hell mixes up Peter Gabriel with Phil Collins G C G (Well fuck you, I guess I'm no expert) (in fucking nineties music) (whatever) No, you're not eighties D C G [On the night I laid you down] D C G [On the night I laid you down] xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 9. T o o J e s u s y xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tabbed by Jordan Lapping Tuning: E (Standard), Capo 1st Fret [No capo when played live] CHORDS USED [relative to Capo]: Am C Csus4 Em F G G7 e]---0----0----0----0----1----3----1---| B]---1----1----1----0----1----0----0---| G]---2----0----0----0----2----0----0---| D]---2----2----3----2----3----0----0---| A]---0----3----3----2----3----2----2---| E]------------------0----1----3----3---| INTRO: ||: C / / Csus4 | C / / Csus4 :|| (x2) VERSE 1: Am Oh baby, you were such a tease F C Csus4 Only get down on your knees to pray C Csus4 To pray Am And something in your Bible says F G Not to let me share your bed today G7 Today CHORUS 1: C G Oh, now I see Am Em That you turned out to be F G (C) Too Jesusy for me TRANSITION 1: ||: C / / Csus4 | C / / Csus4 :|| (x2) VERSE 2: Am Our life was filled with sexy and kink F C Csus4 Cigarettes and weed, and drink and beer C Csus4 And beer Am Now it's Bible verse and Bible class F G And Bible shove it up your arse, my dear G7 My dear CHORUS 2: C G 'Cause you and me Am Em Plus Jesus makes three F G (C) That's too Jesusy for me TRANSITION 2: || C / / Csus4 | C / / Csus4 || BRIDGE: G You and I are through F C Can I please get an Amen? G 'Cause I got bored with you F G G7 When you got all born again INSTRUMENTAL INTERLUDE: || C / / / | G / / / | Am / / / | Em / / / | F / / / | G / / / || || C / / Csus4 | C / / Csus4 || VERSE 3: Am I'm sick of hearing about that guy F C Csus4 His magic kingdom in the sky above C Csus4 Above Am So take that precious cross you wear F G And give yourself a Linda Blair, my love G7 My love CHORUS 3: C G If Jesus were me Am Em Even he would agree F G Am G You're too Jesusy for me, for me F G (C) Too Jesusy for me OUTRO: || C / / Csus4 | C / / Csus4 || || C / / Csus4 | C || xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 10. T h e G a t h e r i n g xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tabbed by Jordan Lapping Tuning: E (Standard), Capo 5th Fret CHORDS USED [relative to Capo]: C Csus4 D Em G e]---0----0----2----0----3---| B]---1----1----3----0----0---| G]---0----0----2----0----0---| D]---2----3----0----2----0---| A]---3----3---------2----2---| E]------------------0----3---| INTRO: || G / / / | C / Csus4 C | G / / / | C / Csus4 C || VERSE 1: G C Csus4 C G Dare I say, the greatest po- -ets of our day C Csus4 C Em C D Shaggy 2 Dope and Violent Jay; the hip hip clowns G C Csus4 C G Haters see just white-trash family C Csus4 C Em C D They say fan of I.C.P. must have the downs CHORUS 1: C D G I don't care, I love them so C D G Cornrow my hair and drink Faygo C D N/C I'm every where - I am Juggalo TRANSITION 1: || G / / / | C / Csus4 C | G / / / | C / Csus4 C || VERSE 2: G C Csus4 C G Let us sing of the an-nual gathering C Csus4 C Em C D Come see a cultural happening, and also tits G C Csus4 C G Call us sick, say you hate our wigger schtick C Csus4 C Em C D But it's about the music, and also tits CHORUS 2: C D G You put us down but you don't know C D G I'm a proud clown, and so's my hoe C D N/C I wear the crown of Juggalo TRANSITION 2: || G / / / | C / Csus4 C | G / / / | C / Csus4 C || || Am / / / | C / / / | D / / / | D / / / || CHORUS 3: C D G Come along to the posse show C D G Our bond is strong, like magnets, yo C D N/C I sing this song for the Juggalo OUTRO: || G / / / | C / Csus4 C | G / / / | C / Csus4 C | G || xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 11. Y o u ' l l D o xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tabbed by Jordan Lapping Tuning: E (Standard) CHORDS USED: C D Em G e]---0----2----0----3---| B]---1----3----0----0---| G]---0----2----0----0---| D]---2----0----2----0---| A]---3---------2----2---| E]-------------0----3---| INTRO: || G / / / | Em / C / | G / / / | Em / C / || VERSE 1 Stephen + (Courtney): G Em C G Em C I've been drinking here since 5, it's 2AM and everybody's gone G Em C G Em C The bar man's cleaning up, the jukebox off and all the lights are on G Em C G Em C (I look up from my PBR, and see your desperate stare) G Em C G Em C (Well, you're a drunk and I've got low esteem, we make a perfect pair) CHORUS 1 [Both] + Stephen: D C [And we can read each other's minds] D C [Tonight we're the best that we could find] C G Em C There's no one left but you - [I guess you'll do] G Em C [I guess you'll do] TRANSITION 1: || G / / / | Em / C / | G / / / | Em / C / || VERSE 2 (Courtney) + Stephen: G Em C G Em C (You're not the kind of guy I would ever tell me friends about) G Em C G Em C I smell like Taco Bell, you'll probably get sick when we make out G Em C G Em C (And I bet you've never been with someone quite my size) G Em C G Em C Yeah, but your face not so bad, if I kinda squint my eyes CHORUS 2 [Both] + Stephen: D C [And even though you're gonna laugh] D C [For the minute a half] that I'm inside of you G Em C [I guess you'll do] G Em C [I guess you'll do] BRIDGE [Both] + Stephen + (Courtney): Em D C [We wear our desperation well] walking into this motel Em D C [A scent of sadness fills the room] along with your cheap perfume N/C G Em C (...And Taco Bell) G Em C [And Taco Bell] TRANSITION 2: || G / / / | Em / C / | G / / / | Em / C / || (x2) CHORUS 2 [Both] + Stephen: D C [And I don't mean to be unkind] D C [But baby, even you don't mind] an STD or two G Em C [I guess you'll do] G Em C [I guess you'll do] G I guess you'll do xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 12. W h i s k e y D i c k xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tabbed by Jordan Lapping Tuning: E (Standard) CHORDS USED: Am C Fmaj7 e]---0----0----0---| B]---1----1----1---| G]---2----0----2---| D]---2----2----3---| A]---0----3----x---| E]-----------------| INTRO: Am C Fmaj7 e]---------------0----------------0----------------0-------------------| B]------1----------------1----------------1----------------------------| G]---------2----------------0----------------2-------------------------| D]------------2----------------2------3---------3----------------------| (x4) A]--0----------------3-------------------------------------------------| E]---------------------------------------------------------------------| VERSE 1: Am C Fmaj7 e]---------------0----------------0----------------0-------------------| B]------1----------------1----------------1----------------------------| G]---------2----------------0----------------2-------------------------| D]------------2----------------2------3---------3----------------------| (x4) A]--0----------------3-------------------------------------------------| E]---------------------------------------------------------------------| Am C Fmaj7 e]--------0----------------0----------------0---------------0----------| B]------------1----------------1----------------1-------1-------1------| G]----2-----------2----0-----------0----3-----------3---------------3--| D]------------------------------------3---3---3---3---3---3---3---3----| (x4) A]--0---0---0---0----3---3---3---3-------------------------------------| E]---------------------------------------------------------------------| Am C Fmaj7 Am C Fmaj7 Oh my God, I feel sick Am C Fmaj7 Am C Fmaj7 Drank too much; whis-key dick Am C Fmaj7 Am C Fmaj7 Tried so hard with this chick Am C Fmaj7 Am C Fmaj7 Still too soft; whis-key dick TRANSITION 1: Am C Fmaj7 e]--------0----------------0----------------0---------------0----------| B]------------1----------------1----------------1-------1-------1------| G]----2-----------2----0-----------0----3-----------3---------------3--| D]------------------------------------3---3---3---3---3---3---3---3----| (x4) A]--0---0---0---0----3---3---3---3-------------------------------------| E]---------------------------------------------------------------------| VERSE 2: Am C Fmaj7 Am C Fmaj7 Rise it must, point to prove Am C Fmaj7 Am C Fmaj7 Wait, I just felt it move Am C Fmaj7 Am C Fmaj7 Tried a-gain, have no doubt Am C Fmaj7 Am C Fmaj7 Now it's in; fell back out TRANSITION 2: ||: Am / / / | C / / / | Fmaj7 / / / | Fmaj7 / / / :|| (x8) BRIDGE: Am C Fmaj7 Pleasure she is not receiving Am C Fmaj7 Bored and angry, now she's leaving Am C Fmaj7 It just lies there, looking guilty Am C Fmaj7 Small and shrivelled, white and wilty TRANSITION 3: Am C Fmaj7 e]---------------0----------------0----------------0-------------------| B]------1----------------1----------------1----------------------------| G]---------2----------------0----------------2-------------------------| D]------------2----------------2------3---------3----------------------| (x2) A]--0----------------3-------------------------------------------------| E]---------------------------------------------------------------------| VERSE 3/OUTRO: Am C Fmaj7 e]---------------0----------------0----------------0-------------------| B]------1----------------1----------------1----------------------------| G]---------2----------------0----------------2-------------------------| D]------------2----------------2------3---------3----------------------| (x4) A]--0----------------3-------------------------------------------------| E]---------------------------------------------------------------------| Am C Fmaj7 Am C Fmaj7 Did your best, gave up quick Am C Fmaj7 Am C Fmaj7 Get some rest, whis-key dick xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 13. H e y L o v e xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tabbed by Jordan Lapping Tuning: E (Standard) CHORDS USED: Am C Dm F G G7/F e]---0----0----1----1----3----3---| B]---1----1----3----1----0----0---| G]---2----0----2----2----0----0---| D]---2----2----0----3----0----0---| A]---0----3---------3----2----x---| E]------------------1----3----1---| INTRO: ||: C / / / | G / / / | G7/F / / / | Am / G / :|| (x2) VERSE 1: C G G7/F Am G Love hurts, love's a cruel master C G G7/F Am G Love's a killer, love's a rotten bastard CHORUS 1: Dm C G Dm C G He-y, love, I'm done with you Am G C F Lo-ve will break your heart Dm C G C I hate loving hating love VERSE 2: C G G7/F Am G Love's a douchebag, love wears it hardy C G G7/F Am G Love's a member of the tea party CHORUS 2: Dm C G Dm C G He-y, love, go fuck yourself Am G C F Lo-ve likes Nickleback Dm C G C I hate loving hating love TRANSITION 1: ||: C / / / | G / / / | G7/F / / / | Am / G / :|| (x2) INSTRUMENTAL [CHORUS]: || Dm / C / | G / / / | Dm / C / | G / / / || Am G C F Love has Ann Coulter's face || Dm / C / | G / C / | C / / / | C / / / || VERSE 3: C G G7/F Am G Love's a fan, of the Boston Red Socks C G G7/F Am G Love is a white guy with dreadlocks CHORUS 2: Dm C G Dm C G He-y, love, I can't believe Am G C F Yo-u like Nickleback Dm C G C I hate loving hating love OUTRO: Dm C G Am I laa lala lala lalaaa Dm C G I laa lala laaaa G C Laaa lalaa, lala laa N/C Love's a cunt xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx A n y Q u e s t i o n s ? xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx If you have any questions regarding anything in this guide, feel free to message me over here on Ultimate Guitar. I'll try and respond as quickly as possible, and I'm more than happy to help out if I can. Any corrections may also be messaged to me, but I have done my best to double-check (and triple-check) everything in here. Thanks for reading guys, I hope this proves useful! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx T H E E N D xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx