5. Nickelodeon Girls 8:39 [intro] (Hello, Nickelodeon headquarters) Hi, sorry to disturb you this late in the night I have a serious inquiry directed toward Nickelodeon My question is WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING? You know y'all used to have some fire bitches When I turn on the TV I'm trying to see my favorite bitches Zoey101? Jennette McCurdy? Oh my God And now all you got is these preteens Bruh, I'm not a pedo I'm not trying to look at these little kids and get aroused Now I can't watch Nickelodeon with my dick in my hand anymore Now I'm fucking upset This is some fucking bullshit [chorus] C#m Ab Dan Schneider bring all my bitches back C#m Ab I need all my bitches, I need all my bitches The new shit you put out is wack C#m Ab Dan Schneider I'm just trying to get an erection C#m Ab But now that these kids looking 13 and under My penis will suffer [verse] C#m Dan fucking Schneider (Schneider) Ab This ain't a fucking game, bitch C#m I wanna watch a sitcom Ab With my hand on my dick C#m I wanna see a titty (titty) Ab Not fucking kid shit C#m Return all the hot chicks Ab Or you gon get it bitch C#m ICarly, iCarly Ab I don't care if you look like Michael Jackson C#m As long as you giving me action Ab And Freddy gon' film the reaction C#m Sam gonna join in Ab And suck me a fat one C#m Nickelodeon girls Ab Can't live without 'em (whew) [verse] C#m Ariana Grande Ab I know I drive a Hyundai C#m I can put you in a coma Ab Have brunch on a Sunday (fancy) C#m My dick put you in a coffin Ab All night screaming and tossing C#m Victoria Justice Ab I know you tryna touch this C#m Lizzie McGuire is tight Ab But I bet Zoey's tighter C#m You can find me in her bed Ab Digging through that vaginer C#m Amanda Bynes, you a little bit crazy Ab But you can still have my babies (whew) C#m Go down like a dog with the rabies Ab Y'all can't save me [bridge] C#m Uh, a little bit of weed, hard liquor for the ladies Ab Got me feeling like a young Dan Schneider from the 80's C#m With a Jewish law firm and an all black Mercedes Ab She playing with the balls like Brady (ay) C#m Fuck off with the shitty little kids with their stupid shit Ab I only wanna see the ones with a body fit C#m And I don't want to be the one to be a little bitch about it Ab But I'm just saying what everybody is thinking (hahahahaha) [verse] C#m Where the titties at? Ab Dan Schneider why you ruining your business? C#m You realize I'd probably buy cable Ab If you keep all the girls and the ratings all stable C#m Cuz I ain't tryin to see a young baby in the cradle Ab Cuz I'm not a pedophile [bridge] C#m Ab The girls I have sexualized are all in their 20's and 30's (Disclaimer!) C#m I'm not saying you should change all the bitches Ab But at least something after 10:30 (30!) [chorus] C#m Ab Dan Schneider bring all my bitches back C#m Ab I need all my bitches, I need all my bitches, I need all my bitches back
